preface my P.E. report cards with a little explanation of my attitude toward
physical exertion of any kind:
education & Exercise are words that have always struck the fear of God in me.
Running, Working Out, and that Jazzercise crap makes my sphincter jiggle like jelly.
30 years, I can only recall four occasions where I committed an unforced act of exercise.
In 1986 I
started doing sit ups, I got up to 50! But
then I had to quit because of a carpet
burn on me bum.
In 1987, I started to do sit ups again, but the first day of reps
made me arse sore again, so I took a decade off to recover.
In '97, I moved into an
apartment complex with a resident's gym. It had everything! State of the friggin' art
But after a couple of nights of light to moderate tread millin' and
weights I'd had enough, man oh man was my bottom sore for ages. So I just had to take some time out from
all that malarkey. Finally, a few years ago,
in a spurt of confidence and untapped energy, I went out and bought some
dumbbells...ergh, I mean "A" dumbbell and I think it's in the garage collecting
Anyway, it seems this
pathetic tradition of lethargy has been the one constant (other than masturbation) in my life. It made no difference when an authoritarian
tried to get me involved either; however, they were paid to try, and try they
did...but they always
Check out poor Master Bates' effort to get me pumped up
about P.E. from my time at Mostyn House.